Thriving Leadership in a Calloused World

Credit: Google Images

If you live in a graveyard too long you stop crying when someone dies. – Anon.

In addition to Mt. Rushmore, one of Gutzon Borglum’s great works as a sculptor is the head of Lincoln in the Capitol at Washington. He cut it from a large, square block of stone in his studio. One day, when the face of Lincoln was just becoming recognizable out of the stone, a young girl was visiting the studio with her parents. She looked at the half-done face of Lincoln, her eyes registering wonder and astonishment. She stared at the piece for a moment then ran to the sculptor. “Is that Abraham Lincoln?” she asked. “Yes.” “Well,” said the little girl, “how in the world did you know he was inside there?”

The question posed by that young girl is an appropriate one for the likes of sculptor Gutzon Borglum. His work is rightfully critiqued by the product he produces.

What about you? How would an outsider look upon your leadership and what observations would they make? What inward image do you project? The truth is: what’s on the inside will come out. It always does.

I’m at the age where it could be very easy to be cynical or calloused in my thinking. And quite honestly, some days it’s a challenge.  Hang around in leadership long enough and you can get to the place where you have seen it all, heard it all, and there’s just not much that shocks you anymore. Can you relate?

Studies have shown that those in their first year in a new job are among the happiest in the organization. Contrast that with more tenured employees and you will find vastly different attitudes and opinions.

So how do you retain a healthy perspective as a leader and not become so calloused that you are no longer effective? It’s a challenge we all struggle with. Here are a few tips for your consideration.

Watch your attitude

Your attitude will make you or break you. It always has and it always will. You can come to a place over time that you feel no one is listening, no one wants to improve or change, and that there’s just no reason to be optimistic. Can you relate? This way of thinking can cause your attitude to sour and your leadership to be ineffective.

If you are going to thrive as a leader you must watch your attitude and remember that you are not responsible for other people’s attitudes and actions. You are only accountable for one. Yours. Guard your attitude at all costs. Click To Tweet

Be intentional about your inner circle

In as much as a bad attitude can be disastrous for you as a leader, so too can an inner circle filled with the wrong people.  I absolutely believe that you need diversity in your circle. You need people who will inspire you, challenge you, question you, and bring out the best in you. It’s the sign of a smart and thriving leader. We all need people around us – younger and older – who see the world differently from us. But you don’t need the wrong people.

As a leader, you don’t need people with bad attitudes who bring drama; who are unwilling to change, are afraid to take risks, who protect the status quo, and who are afraid to speak the truth.If you want to thrive as a leader then you must be intentional and selective about your inner circle. Click To Tweet

Hold yourself accountable

We live in a world where cynicism and divisions run deep. As leaders, it can be easy to get sucked into all the negativity that surrounds us on a daily basis. We need trusted friends and advisors around us who can hold us accountable for wrong attitudes, actions, words, and behaviors. Click To Tweet The truth is, we all have blind spots and we need the help. I know I do.

Leadership is a marathon, not a 100-yard dash. So on your journey, keep your attitude strong, be intentional about your inner circle, and hold yourself accountable. You will be a better leader for it and your influence as a leader will be worth emulating.

 

©2019 Doug Dickerson

Please follow and like us:

Three Things Every Leader Needs To Know About Criticism

Critics

Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfills the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things. – Winston Churchill

I came across a story about Grace Coolidge, the wife of President Calvin Coolidge who tried to surprise her husband by having his portrait painted. When it was finished, she hung it in the library of the White House. Later the same morning the President happened to walk into the library accompanied by a senator. They stared at the picture together in silence. Finally Coolidge commented quietly: “I think so, too.”

When you hear the word criticism what is the first thought that comes to your mind? Many take on a defensive posture as it relates to critics. We are quick to defend our words, actions, and decisions.

Often times, however, our growth in leadership does not always come via the praise or accolades of adoring followers. In fact, a lot of it comes during our dark times that are usually quite lonely.

Conventional wisdom says to keep your friends close and your enemies closer. What about critics? Should you keep them at a distance or keep them close? Here are three insights that hopefully will give you some perspective.

Every leader needs a constructive critic

As a leader you will have plenty of critics. Many of them will not be constructive. But when you are committed to your own personal growth and to the success and growth of your people then finding a colleague who can be your constructive critic should not be hard to find.

Your constructive critic is the one who can help you see all sides of an issue, help guide you in your decision making, and cares enough to call you out when needed.

You need constructive critics in your life and you should welcome them in. One constructive critic will be more valuable to you than a room full of “yes people” ever will.

Every leader needs to be accountable

The purpose of a constructive critic is not to make your life miserable but to keep you accountable. A leader should never ascend to the place either in position or in mentality that they are above criticism. We need trusted advisors near us to help us.

I know that many leaders take criticism personal and see those who would dare to criticize as less than loyal, out to cause harm, or advance their own agenda. As a result relationships are strained due to insecurities and people are looked upon with suspicion. It’s a fragmented culture that is hard to reverse.

But when you as a leader set the example for what accountability looks like it can be healthy for the whole organization and it can make a world of difference.

Every leader needs to set the example

John Maxwell said, “Effective leaders know that first you have to touch people’s hearts before you ask them for a hand.” This is a profoundly simple rule of leadership. It’s also, I believe, the springboard of constructive criticism.

As a leader you will give more constructive criticism than you will receive and it’s important to do it right. Constructive criticism will be better received and more effective when it’s born out of a good relationship.  If the only time you interact with a person you lead is to be the messenger of how to do something better or to point out something they have done wrong then it will build resentment.

Critics and criticism will be a constant on your leadership journey. Learning the keys to receive it and give it will make you a wiser and more effective leader.

What do you say?

 

©2015 Doug Dickerson

 

 

 

 

Please follow and like us:

Five Excuses That Kill Accountability with guest co-author Elizabeth Stincelli

accountability-responsibility

The problem that we have with a victim mentality is that we forget to see the blessings of the day. Because of this, our spirit is poisoned instead of nourished.” – Steve Maraboli

As a leader there are few things more important than creating a strong and healthy organizational culture for your employees to thrive in. It’s up to you as the leader to be proactive and take the lead in developing the organizational climate you wish to have.

Unfortunately, many harmful behaviors threaten the fabric of the culture that you are trying to create. These behaviors include bullying, manipulation, office politics, etc., and they each pose a real threat. But there is one in particular that we would like to address – so here is our question: Is a victim mentality preventing accountability in your organization?

No doubt there are accountability measures in place within your organization that serve to track performance and measure each person’s progress. Accountability measures are healthy and necessary and keep everyone focused on shared goals and outcomes.

But what happens when a team member perpetuates a victim mentality? What does it sounds like? Here are five common claims that will give you some insight.

It’s not fair

The “it’s not fair” mantra is perhaps the oldest one in the book. It can be used when an employee feels that his or her work has gone unnoticed, was passed over for a raise or promotion, or has made an improper comparison of the value of their work in relation to a colleague. Whether justified or not, this feeling of being on the receiving end of unfair treatment is a source of concern. As a leader it is up to you to address it. Accountability makes sense when each person on the team has a clear picture of the value they bring to the organization. Don’t let an employee’s feelings of being slighted go unanswered.  When they see and understand their importance they will not see accountability as a threat.

Finger pointing

Finger pointing is so destructive because it’s so easy. It’s the first gesture of the least accountable. Yet sadly, the blame game is alive and well. But clear expectations of employee performance along with useful accountability guidelines will go a long way toward bringing an end to finger pointing and fault-finding. As a leader, you must take ownership of these expectations. When employees can build a collaborative team environment around the idea that “we are in this together”, it can unleash everything that is good and creative about your people. Finger pointing now gives way to mutual accountability, and fault-finding takes a back seat to an “I’ve got your back” mentality. Which would you rather have?

It’s Not My Job

When employees have the mindset that they are only responsible for specific, outlined tasks, it is easy for them to dodge accountability with the simple statement, ‘it’s not my job’. The most effective organizations are the ones where everyone has the opportunity to make an impact. As a leader, you must create a culture of collaboration and teamwork where everyone feels they have a vested interest in the outcome. Let employees see you roll up your sleeves and do what needs to be done regardless of your formal job description. Achieve accountability by replacing the mindset of ‘it’s not my job’ with ‘I benefit when everyone participates as a whole’.

Feeling Powerless

Employees will not take accountability for decisions or tasks which they feel they have no control over. As a leader, you must provide employees with pertinent information and encourage them to ask questions. Then, give them the power to make decisions and design how their work gets done.  Accountability will increase dramatically when employees are given power and control over their own work.

Denying Responsibility

Employees often deny responsibility out of fear or frustration. They fear the repercussions for failure or they are frustrated by a lack of clear expectations and control over their work. As a leader, you must create a team mentality. Help employees understand that when one team member fails to carry their weight, they drag down the performance of the whole team. Inspire in them shared values and clearly communicate expectations. Teach problem solving and creative conflict resolution skills throughout your organization. Increase accountability by removing the fear of failure and building employee confidence by giving them a sense of control.

As a leader, it is your responsibility to develop a culture that encourages accountability and discourages a victim mentality. If your employees willingly accept accountability for their decisions and actions, your organizational effectiveness will skyrocket.

© 2015 Doug Dickerson & Elizabeth Stincelli

 

*Elizabeth Stincelli is passionate about recognizing and inspiring the leader in each of us. She is the CEO of Stincelli Advisors where she focuses on helping organizations engage employees and improve organizational culture. Elizabeth holds a Doctor of Management degree with an emphasis on organizational leadership. Learn more about Elizabeth by visiting her website, stincelliadvisors.com You can contact her by email at [email protected].

Please follow and like us: