Leadership In a Word: Disappointment

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Sometimes when you get disappointment it makes you stronger. – David Rudisha

A word about disappointment

In 1858 the Illinois legislature–using an obscure statute–sent Stephen A. Douglas to the U.S. Senate instead of Abraham Lincoln, although Lincoln had won the popular vote. When a sympathetic friend asked Lincoln how he felt, he said, “Like the boy who stubbed his toe: I am too big to cry and too badly hurt to laugh.”

Lincoln’s reaction is a good reminder that we all at times can feel the sting of disappointment. In leadership, it’s much the same. We have those times when we feel let down or disappointed when things don’t turn out the way we planned. In short, life happens.

When disappointments come your way as a leader, here are three truths you need to remember.

Disappointments are inevitable

That statement is not meant to discourage you but rather to motivate you. No leader is immune from times of disappointment. It comes with the territory. So here is what you need to know – you are not the sum of your disappointments, setbacks, or failures. They are not your roadblocks, they are your stepping stones. The inevitability of disappointments coupled with the right attitude and outlook will set you up for the inevitability of your success. Don’t give up!

Disappointments are proportional to your risks

Simply put, the more risks you take, the more disappointments you will experience. Thomas Edison knew about this first hand. He suffered many setbacks and losses. It was his attitude in the face of those disappointments that set him apart. Edison once said, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work”. It was his positive attitude that caused him to succeed even in the face of adversity. Don’t allow the size of the risk or disappointment keep you from chasing after your dreams.

Disappointments are opportunities to regroup

The outcome of every disappointment is not meant to be fatal. Sometimes there is a greater purpose to the disappointment – something beyond what you see at the moment. Don’t allow your present negative feelings to cloud your thinking or how you can make your situation better going forward. Let the disappointment be your teacher, and move forward with the wisdom you’ve gained.

Disappointment quotes

“We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope.” – Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

“The size of your success is measured by the strength of your desire; the size of your dream; and how you handle disappointment along the way.” – Robert Kiyosaki

“If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment.” – Thoreau

“Anytime you suffer a setback or disappointment, put your head down and plow ahead.” – Les Brown

A final word

Thomas Edison also said, “Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” Disappointments will come your way as a leader, but don’t be discouraged or sidetracked. See the big picture and know that your disappointments are only momentary.

©2018 Doug Dickerson

Leadership In a Word: Resolve

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Wise to resolve, and patient to perform. – Homer

Word study

1 obsolete : dissolve, melt

4a : to deal with successfully : clear up

  • resolve doubts
  • resolve a dispute

b : to find an answer to

c : to make clear or understandable

d : to find a mathematical solution of

e : to split up into two or more components especially in assigned directions

  • resolve a vector

5: to reach a firm decision about

  • resolve to get more sleep
  • resolve disputed points in a text

Source: Merriam-Webster

A word about resolve

As in many words that come to mind when one thinks of leadership, resolve is one that continuously makes the list. It’s in our resolve that we made as leaders.

I was reminded of a story I heard about President Abraham Lincoln. The final draft of the Emancipation Proclamation was taken to Lincoln at noon on January 1, 1863. Twice the president picked up his pen to sign it, and twice he laid it down. Turning to Secretary of State William Seward, he said, “I have been shaking hands since 9:00 this morning, and my right arm is almost paralyzed. If my name ever goes into history, it will be for this act, and my whole soul is in it. If my hand trembles when I sign the proclamation, all who examine the document hereafter will say, ‘He hesitated.'”

The president then took up the pen again and slowly but firmly wrote, “Abraham Lincoln.” That historic act endeared Lincoln to the world as the Great Emancipator.

While the things you do may not rise to the level of the Emancipation Proclamation,  resolve, nonetheless, is crucial to your success as a leader. Many things will compete for your time and attention. Distraction will come your way. Tough and unpopular decisions will be yours to make. Your resolve in these times is what will see you through. So here are a few points of clarity to help you define your resolve with yourself and with the people you lead.

Resolve to listen to your people

What makes you a leader of significance is found not so much in your ability to talk but in how well you listen. Listening is a lost art in communication. Resolve to listen more.

Resolve to believe the best in your people

The people you lead not only need your ear but they also need your heart. When you resolve to believe the best in your people and see them as “10’s” they will rise to the challenge.

Resolve to challenge your people

Bringing out the best in your people means raising the bar for your people. Let them know that their goals, dreams, and aspirations and yours are one in the same. Resolve to lift your team to new levels.

Resolve to never stop growing

Simply put, the growth of the leader determines the growth of the people. As a leader, you set the example. You can’t lead people to new levels of growth and development if are not growing yourself.

Resolve to live in your ‘why’

“The two most important days in your life,” said Mark Twain, “are the day you were born and the day you find out why”. Resolve to know your ‘why’ and live it. This is your purpose, this is your destiny, and this must be your resolve as a leader.

Resolve quotes

“Resolve never to quit, never to give up, no matter what the situation”. – Jack Nicklaus

“Resolve to learn something new everyday. Because every 24 hours, you have the opportunity to have the best day of your company’s life”. – Harvey Mackay

“Your success and happiness lies in you. Resolve to keep happy, and your joy and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties.” – Helen Keller

“Determination gives you the resolve to keep going in spite of roadblocks that lay before you”. – Denis Waitley

A final word

A leader’s resolve, I believe, is one of the noblest of characteristics he or she possesses. With it, you can lead with integrity and authority. In many areas of your leadership, you will be required to summons resolve. Courageously embrace it.

 

©2018 Doug Dickerson