Pushing Through Your Frustrations

 

Credit: Google Images

Needing to have things perfect is the surest way to immobilize yourself with frustration. – Wayne Dyer

I read a story once about a famous composer who had a rebellious son who would stay out late at night and come home after his father and mother had gone to bed. Before going to his room, he would stop by his father’s piano and slowly and loudly play a simple scale, all but the last note.

Then, leaving the scale uncompleted, he would retire to his room. Meanwhile, the father, hearing the scale minus the final note, would writhe in bed, his mind unable to relax because the scale was unresolved. Finally, in consternation, he would stumble down the stairs and hit the previously unstruck note. Only then, would he be able to return to his bed and go to sleep.

I have to confess that I find the story humorous. If only for a moment I channel my inner prankster, I could find myself doing such a thing. 

Here’s what I know, we all have frustrations that we deal with on a regular basis. We all have pet peeves that irritate us. 

A story in Forbes magazine revealed the Top 10 pet peeves in the office. They were: gossip and office politics, people taking others’ lunch, inconsiderate co-workers, constant interruptions, loud and annoying ringtones, poorly organized meetings, overcrowded and noisy office spaces, smelly food in the office, inadequate temperature control, and finally,  forced birthday celebrations.

Which one(s) do you most identify with?

It’s important to be self-aware and be in touch with your frustrations and how they impact your leadership. Owning what frustrates you is an important first step, but not allowing those frustrations to boil over is equally as important. So here are a few tips for you as a leader to push through your frustrations.

Be at peace with your frustrations

Owning the frustrations is a good first step and can help you be at peace with it. This doesn’t mean that this frustration doesn’t need to be addressed or resolved, but you have to give yourself permission to be frustrated. From there, you can begin seeking solutions to what frustrates you – determine if it can be changed and if not, how your attitude towards it needs to change. But first and foremost, own it and be at peace with what frustrates you.

Own your frustrations

Pushing through your frustrations means that you own it. It means that you do not allow what frustrates you to control you or dictate your attitude or your performance. It means that you take control of the negative emotions that would otherwise derail you. Owning it simply means that you are naming or identifying what is frustrating you and you are committed to pushing through it with a good attitude.

Know what you can and cannot control

Nothing with frustrate you more than trying to push through and change something that frustrates you that you have no control over. For example, if a co-worker has a quirky personality that rubs you the wrong way, chances are you are not going to be able to do much about that. People are wired the way they are wired whether you like it or not. And that truth cuts both ways.

If however, your pet peeve falls into your purview as the leader in your organization and said the co-worker is constantly late for work – which is one of your pet peeves, then yes, you can do something about it.

Nothing will frustrate you more than trying to control what you can’t. Effectively pushing through your frustrations is all about working from this knowledge.

 

©2023 Doug Dickerson

 

Next Steps: As you reflect on my article this week, consider the following:

  1. What would you identify as your top pet peeve as it relates to you in your workplace?
  2. . What is one thing that you can do today that would help you “own it” – attitude change, etc.?
  3. Is this pet peeve an internal change you are going to have to deal with it, or is it something that you can directly do something about?

Remember – You can be at peace with your frustrations and you do not have to allow them to control you. Is your attitude toward your frustration helping or hurting?

 

For more information on my coaching services, email me at:  [email protected]

Checking Your Bags

We all have baggage. The question is: What baggage can you deal with? – Jaime Pressly

I recently took my first trip out of the country since Covid. As a person who loves to travel it was great to once again get the proverbial passport stamp and experience a different culture.

Belize is already hot as it’s summer there. But the trip was great, the water was beautiful, and snorkeling with the stingrays and sharks at Cay Caulker was a thrill.

When it comes to air travel, of course, the more things change, the more they stay the same. I’ve traveled the world, and prefer to travel as lightly as possible. But there comes that time you have to decide whether to check a bag, carry-on only, or both. One way or another, you have to decide what you’re going to do about your bags.

In leadership, as in life, you have to decide what you’re going to do with your baggage. We all have some and how we deal with it makes all the difference. 

Here are a few lessons I’ve learned as a traveler and as a leader about carrying baggage. See if you can relate to any of the following.

Only pack the essentials

When traveling, it’s wise to only pack what you need. Keep it to the essentials. The lighter your load the farther and faster you can move. I’ve seen people pack for a week-long trip and you would have thought they were going to be gone for a month.

Leadership Tip: In leadership, excess baggage such as a poor attitude, grudges against a colleague, poor morale, etc. can weigh you and your organization down. In travel, excess baggage will cost you. It will cost you in your leadership as well. To move forward, you will have to have some items in your bags so you’d better be smart about it.

You don’t have to carry other people’s bags

You are not responsible for other people’s baggage. When maneuvering through an airport, you typically have all you can do to keep up with your own bags, much less anyone else’s. And, you never leave your bag unattended. 

Leadership Tip: In leadership, you will deal with a variety of people with differing levels of baggage – some good, some not. It’s essential as a leader that you recognize that there will be some people who will try to bring their negative baggage with them into your culture. And once it gets in, it’s hard to get it out. Just as you go through screening at the airport, you have to screen and weed out negative influences and toxic people from within your organization. 

Don’t weigh yourself down

We’ve come a long way over the years when it comes to moving about with luggage when traveling. You no longer have to bear the burden of heavy bags and moving about with them – think spinners. 

Leadership Tip: In leadership, you want to utilize every tool at your disposal and surround yourself with people who can help move things along. You don’t have to be weighed down by outdated methods and procedures. You can lighten the load for yourself and others by checking your bags carefully and packing in such a way that everyone can benefit.

 

©2023 Doug Dickerson

Leadership Lessons From a Weary Traveler

Credit: Google Images – Delphi, Greece

A good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving. – Lao Tzu

Some years ago, I was with a group of friends and we were taking a day trip from Athens, Greece up to Delphi – some 115 miles away. We were off to see some of the ancient ruins – including the famed Delhi sanctuary and the Delphi museum. 

After enjoying our day in Delphi, the time came to return to Athens. But there was a catch. The weather turned bad and they were experiencing the worse snowstorm they’d had in many years. The route back to Athens would not be the one we would take going back.

We made our way over to the coast and hopped on a ferry that eventually returned us to Athens. What normally would have taken only a couple of hours turned into a long and tiring trip that got us back safely but exhausted.

On a humorous note, while aboard the ferry, some in our group made mention of the need to use the restroom. A smiling deckhand kindly pointed to the sign on a door where the restroom was located. Upon opening the door, the “facilities” was simply a hole in the floor a couple of inches in diameter. Several made the decision to wait until we were back on land.

In your leadership, there will be times when things do not go according to plan. And when this happens, you will have to adjust accordingly. Here are a few things to remember as you face the unexpected.

Flexibility is essential

It’s been said that what doesn’t bend, breaks. And in leadership, you have to anticipate the unexpected, and when it happens you have to be flexible at the moment. John Maxwell observed it this way, “Flexibility says there is more than one answer.” And this is what smart leaders recognize – there is more than one answer to whatever you’re going through. 

Your attitude matters

When we left Athens for our day trip over to Delphi, we had no way of knowing that one of the worse snow in decades was going to happen that day. But – snow happens! In leadership, sometimes the unexpected happens. In these moments we are reminded that it’s not what happens to us that matters, it’s how we respond. Your attitude in times of adversity will make you or break you. Choose it wisely.

Adaptability is your ally

One definition says an adaptable leader is “someone who is able to change their behavior in response to changes in a situation.” It’s inevitable that you will face challenges and changes in your leadership. When they come, being adaptable will not only serve you well but can be an invaluable teachable moment for your team to learn from. 


Final Thoughts

Just as it was for my trip to Delphi, the road that has brought you to where you are today, may not be the same road to take you to the next level tomorrow. Conditions on the ground may change and you have to learn to be flexible, guard your attitude, and be adaptable. 

 

©2023 Doug Dickerson

The Centrality of Trust in Leadership

Trust is the lubrication that makes it possible for organizations to work. – Warren Bennis

There is an old story of a father who took his young son out and stood him on the railing of the back porch. He then went down, stood on the lawn, and encouraged the little fellow to jump into his arms. “I’ll catch you,” the father said confidently. After a lot of coaxing, the little boy finally made the leap. When he did, the father stepped back and let the child fall to the ground. He then picked his son up, dusted him off, and dried his tears. 

“Let that be a lesson,” he said sternly, “Don’t ever trust anyone.”

While that’s a harsh way to teach a lesson about trust, the foundations of trust – what it is, what it means to be trustworthy, is something that needs to be taught at an early age.

An article in studyfinds.org found that the average American has five people in their life they have a strong relationship with and can lean on for anything. From finding someone who is trustworthy or a good listener to finding someone loyal, nearly three-quarters of respondents to a survey agree that strong partnerships help simplify the complexities of life.

While it may appear, at least on the surface, that most people have at least five people in their circle that they can trust or confide in – is the circle far-reaching enough to include the workplace and other areas critical to the success of a leader?

With trust as the focal point of your leadership, there is the potential for great opportunity and success. While trust does not guarantee this success, one thing is certain, there will never be success without it.

How then does a leader make trust the center point of his or her leadership? What does it look like? Why does it matter? Take these points into consideration.

Trust is an inside job first

In order to be a trusted leader, you first have to be trustworthy. Being trustworthy is an inside job. It’s the bedrock of your character and the needle of your moral compass. Trust is developed over time and is an integral part of your character development. Before you are a trusted leader externally, you first have to develop it on the inside. Click To Tweet

Trust is a validation

It’s commonly said that trust has to be earned. And while that is true in many respects, I see trust more as a validation that it’s been seen and observed over time, and has been recognized as a reliable character trait of the leader. When your trust has been validated by the people you lead, you now have the opportunity to lead them with a greater purpose.

Trust is verifiable

Making trust the central point in your leadership also makes it verifiable. Trust is validated not by your words but by your actions. As a leader, this is crucial. Nothing will cause your people to lose confidence in your leadership more than being unreliable and creating uncertainty in their minds about your ability to deliver on what you say. If trust is a validation of your leadership, it’s verified by your daily decisions and actions.

Trust is fragile

While no leader in good faith sets out to purposefully violate his or her trust, it must be handled with care. No leader is perfect and even the best mess up. Unrealistic expectations can be hard to manage, and trust is not exclusive to only the leader. Trust is a two-way street that all must be striving for and protect. The expectation of trust in the leader ought to be the standard for all. Click To Tweet

Final Thoughts

“Character makes trust possible, and trust is the foundation of leadership,” says John Maxwell. I agree. Trust is the glue that holds it all together and as a leader, it must take center stage in your leadership. 

 

©2022 Doug Dickerson

How Anxiety Impacts Your Leadership – Part Two: Stay Calm

Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strength. -Charles Spurgeon

In Part One of How Anxiety Impacts Your Leadership, I shared a story from the book by Tod Bolsinger entitled Canoeing the Mountains. In the book he shared the story of how when a herd of impala in the brutal African heat find a watering hole they rush to drink, crowding in, fearful of not getting enough water to sustain them. Suddenly, one impala raises his head on high alert. Immediately every other impala stops drinking and stands at attention. At that moment, every impala has a life-or-death decision: Is this a lion or not?

If there is a lion lurking near that spot and they don’t run, they become lion lunch. If there’s no lion lurking near the hole and they do run, they lose their place at the watering hole and could die of thirst. 

If there is a lion and they run, or if there is no lion and they don’t run, they live another day. But all that matters is: Is that a lion or not? Everything in their impala being is focused on making that crucial life-and-death decision. Just like they do every day. Numerous times a day.

Part of what helps the impala make that decision is the herd energy, the animal anxiety that permeates the group and causes them to share listening, hearing, and deciding together. The key takeaway from part one is found in how the impala has to make this split-second decision of determining whether the threat is a lion or not. And translating that into leadership,  are we making decisions based on fear or facts and whether the threats we sense are real or made up? These are critical decisions that have to be made and it’s important to your leadership and your team to get it right.

In our high-anxiety moments as leaders, much is riding on the decision-making process we engage in. As leaders, what are the one or two things that you can do to instill confidence and clarity in the moment? Here in part two, let me offer up a few suggestions.

Stay calm

We’ve heard this statement so much that sometimes I wonder if its true effect of it is lost on us. So what does stay calm really mean for you and me as leaders? Bolsinger defines it this way: “To stay calm is to be so aware of yourself that your response to the situation is not to the anxiety to the people around you but to the actual issue at hand.” And it’s when you are leading on this level that you know you are effective. When your actions as a leader do not raise or contribute to the level of anxiety of those around you, then you know you have a calming effect as a leader.

As a leader, you don’t want to make threats- whether real or perceived- any worse. You want to be able to lead your people with a steady hand and laser-like focus. This can only happen when you are calm on the inside and out.

Make better decisions

An obvious by-product of staying calm is your ability to make better decisions. Bolsigner’s perspective is: “For leaders, the point of calming down is not to feel better; it’s to make better decisions. It’s to make the best decisions for furthering the mission. When people are too hot, they don’t.”


And this is the point we have to remember; anxiety leads to poor decision-making. Whether that’s coming from the people you lead or you as the leader, it can derail the mission because bad decisions were made. Making good decisions is not about being lucky. It’s a result of smart intuitive leadership instincts developed over time and experience. Click To Tweet

Final Thoughts

In one way or another, anxiety is going to impact your leadership. When it does, you can channel that energy into something positive, lead from a place of calm and inner strength, make better decisions, and lead your team forward. 

 

©2022 Doug Dickerson

Focus On Choices, Not Conditions

 

May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears. – Nelson Mandela

“When I was a young boy, my father, a baker, introduced me to the wonders of song,” tenor Luciano Pavarotti relates. “He urged me to work hard to develop my voice. Arrigo Pola, a professional tenor in my hometown of Modena, Italy, took me as a pupil. I also enrolled in a teacher’s college. On graduating, I asked my father, ‘Shall I be a teacher or a singer?’ “Luciano,’ my father replied, ‘If you try to sit on two chairs, you will fall between them. For life, you must choose one chair.’

“I chose one. It took seven years of study and frustration before I made my first professional appearance, and it took another seven to reach the Metropolitan Opera. And now I think whether it’s laying bricks, writing a book-whatever we choose- we should give ourselves to it. Commitment, that’s the key. Choose one chair.”

The lesson from Pavorotti is timeless. In life as in leadership, we must be focused and choose our one chair wisely. 

The most common problem that many of us have when things go wrong is that we tend to focus on the wrong thing. By nature, we tend to look at the conditions around us. And the more we focus on the conditions around us – the problems and the circumstances, we lose focus on what matters most in those moments – choices.

When we are focused on the conditions around us, we tend to be reactionary. When we focus on choices, we tend to think in terms of values. Click To Tweet It’s when you respond to conditions on the ground through the lens of your values that you demonstrate your leadership skill.

In your leadership, you will regularly face the decision to focus on choices or conditions. John Maxwell put it this way, “Those who focus on the external expect conditions to determine whether they keep their commitments. Because conditions are so transitory, their commitment level changes like the wind.” 

In contrast, Maxwell adds, “People who base their actions on the internal usually focus on the choices. Each choice is a crossroad, one that will either confirm or compromise their commitments.” And he identifies three ways to recognize when you come to that crossroad.

A personal decision is required

When you come to your crossroad, you will have to make a personal decision as a leader. Every leader does. And at this moment you must choose to make it based on commitments or conditions.

Know this: Conditions change but commitments remain. Your leadership will ultimately be defined by the choices you make.

The decision will likely cost you something

Every crossroad and every decision carries with it a cost. You will pay a price for your commitments and you will pay a price for your comforts. One is about your short-term benefit, the other is the long game. Click To Tweet

Know this: Each choice you make is a reflection of the maturity of your leadership.

Others will likely be influenced by it

There’s no question that every choice you make will influence others. As a leader, there’s no way around it. With this in mind, think in terms of not what is best for you but how your choice will impact those around you. Every choice has a consequence and every choice is an opportunity to add value to those around you. 

Know this: Each choice you make is a reflection of your influence and ultimately your legacy.

Final Thoughts

Choices or conditions. Every day you will be confronted with them. Where’s your focus? Are you consumed with the problem or are you leading with choices that provide solutions? This is not a new thing to leadership, but if you’re new to leadership, you will need to get this figured out. Choose wisely.

 

©2022 Doug Dickerson

 

What’s In a Name?

To add value to others, one must first value others. – John C. Maxwell

During her second month in nursing school, the professor gave the students a quiz. The last question stumped most people in the class. It read, “What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?”

All the students had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired, and in her 50’s, but how would any of them know her name? Before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward their grade.

“Absolutely,” said the professor. “In your career, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say hello.”

The students never forgot that lesson. They also learned that her name was Dorothy.

As a leader, your interactions with people matter. And how you treat people is a reflection of your character. The value that you place in others says more about your leadership than any title or position you have. And while you may think it makes you look important to name-drop and take selfies with certain people to impress people you will never meet, I believe it’s a greater reflection of your leadership to know the name of the person who empties the trash out of your office. 

Value is given where value is placed. If the person in the lowliest position in your estimation is not worthy of your time, smile, or greeting, then perhaps it’s time to re-evaluate the way in which you look at people.

Here are a few simple reminders for all of us on this journey of life together. It will make you a better person and a better leader to remember them.

Everyone’s fighting a battle

Someone once said (various attributions), “Be kind, everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about.” You never know how your one word of kindness can make a difference in someone’s day. You don’t know the hurts, the fears, the concerns that people around you carry. With this in mind, just be kind. Click To Tweet

Be merciful

Mother Teresa said, “Be kind and merciful. Let no one ever come to you without coming away better and happier.” And this is our mission – to make other people’s interaction with us the highlight of their day. It’s not as hard as you might think.

Be in the moment with others

Marcandangel said, “Don’t be lazy and make judgments about people. Be kind. Ask about their stories. Listen. Be humble. Be open. Be teachable. Be a good neighbor.” Being your best self begins by seeing the best in others.

Walk slowly through the crowd

This is a leadership principle taught by John Maxwell that’s so powerful. We can be so busy and in a hurry to get on to the next thing on our agenda that we walk right past our real work- people. Tasks are important, but not as important as the people you lead. Click To Tweet

Know their name

Dale Carnegie said, “Remember that a person’s name is to that person, is the sweetest and most important sound in any language.” And this is why, I believe, the professor wanted to make sure that the students knew the name of the lady who cleaned the school. And it’s why it should also matter to you.

Final Thoughts

Be a person of value and add value where you can. See the value in those around you and always do your best to be kind and merciful. The world needs it now more than ever.

 

©2022 Doug Dickerson

The Power of Your Tribe: Who Belongs In It and Why

Credit: Google Images

Some people will hear you louder in silence. Those are your tribe- they’ll get you through the tough days and give you something to laugh about on the way. – Nikki Rowe

In one of Shakespeare’s most famous monologues, the Crispen’s Day speech from Henry V, King Henry inspires his soldiers in the face of grim odds with a rousing speech about how the men who fight this battle with him will be forever united as a “band of brothers.” This is a king speaking to peasants, and yet he’s saying that what they are about to go through will unite them all as brothers. 

We don’t always get to choose the battles life throws our way, but we do choose our response. And just as important, we choose the tribe we run with. 

While you may not always have control over the people who surround you in your organization, you do choose your inner circle in life that has a way of completing you. These are the people that walk with you through the good and bad and are there when the dust settles and the smoke clears.

Finding friends and acquaintances is not hard work for the most part, but your tribe is a different breed of people that you discover along the way. Who are they? What are their characteristics?

Charlie “Tremendous” Jones once said, “You will be the same person in five years as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read.” And to that, I would include those who you make part of your tribe. So let’s find out who belongs in your tribe.

Your tribe sees the best in you and keeps you humble; they see the worst in you and still love you

This characteristic of people in your tribe is so important. And quite frankly, you wouldn’t have much of a tribe without them.

They will be quick to celebrate your accomplishments and wins. And when you feel like you’re invincible they will keep you grounded by not being overly impressed by you. When they see you at your worst they will have your back, speak the truth you need to hear, and will walk patiently with you. 

In your tribe you need loyalty.

With your tribe, you share common values 

While it’s common to have many friends and acquaintances, not all of them will share your values and priorities. It’s not a deal-breaker in terms of friendship, but in your tribe, you need those who share and understand the values that drive you and the priorities that guide you. 

When the bond among your tribe is driven by shared values it provides the clarity that you need. When your people understand the significance of your priorities it keeps everyone focused and accountable. It’s why knowing who belongs in your tribe, and those who don’t, is so important. While many may be impressed with what you’re doing and where you’re going, not all are willing to make the sacrifices and pay the same price as you to go there. Click To Tweet

In your tribe you need purpose.

With your tribe, you travel higher and farther

With a shared mindset and values, your growth potential is multiplied. It’s why each person must find their tribe. You can only travel so far by yourself but can travel higher and farther when part of a tribe of like-minded people.

When you are committed to your personal growth and are surrounded by those who share that passion you position yourself and your tribe for greater opportunities and greater impact. Pick your tribe wisely because with them you can go far, but the wrong tribe will hold you back.

In your tribe you need clarity.

With your tribe, you have greater balance and perspective

As you settle in with your tribe of like-minded people, you begin to develop a certain vibe and develop an understanding that is the product of being in a genuine relationship. Over time, you begin to know one another better, and before too long a comradery forms that Shakespeare wrote about.

One of the great benefits of finding your tribe is that those people bring balance and perspective to your life that you may not have with anyone else. Having a close tribe is a game-changer and one that every leader should seek.

In your tribe you need community.

Final Thoughts

Having a tribe of like-minded people is one of the most consequential things you can have as a leader. But you must be intentional in finding them. When it’s built on loyalty, purpose, clarity, and community you will be part of a powerful community. 

 

©2022 Doug Dickerson

 

No Small Roles

Do you wish to rise? Begin by descending. You plan a tower that will pierce the clouds? Lay first the foundation of humility. -St. Augustine

“There are no small roles, only small actors.” This famous line was spoken by Konstantin Stanislavski, “the father of modern acting”, who required actors who performed in his theatre productions to engage their roles with equal commitment, whether they were lead actors with large roles or supporting actors with few lines or no lines at all.

While seen as a sign of accomplishment to land a leading role in acting, one can’t overlook the smaller or supporting roles that can make a movie a success. 

A list compiled at StudoBinder.com lists the Academy Award winners for best-supporting actors. Included on the notable list are Brad  Pitt (Once Upon a Time…in Hollywood), Christian Bale (The Fighter), Heath Ledger (The Dark Knight), George Clooney (Syriana), Robin Williams (Good Will Hunting), Tommy Lee Jones (The Fugitive), Jack Nicholson ( Terms of Endearment), and Jack Lemmon (Mister Roberts), just to name a few. 

When you look at the list of award winners for supporting actors, no one would look upon their respective acting careers in a lesser light due to winning best supporting actor. They are all distinguished in their own right for their contributions not only to those respective films but to the lead roles they’ve starred in since. 

Embracing the mindset of no small roles is critical to the success of any business or organization that looks to make a difference. Nowhere is this more needed than in its approach to leadership. Inside many organizations is an unspoken competition to see who can get the leading roles, be the star of the show, and do whatever it takes to have the spotlight shine on them.

What’s needed is a casting call – a casting call for supporting leaders whose only motivation is what’s best for the team. 

But how do you find such leaders with this mindset? Is it even possible? How do you build a culture where everyone embraces their respective roles for the good of the team? Here are a few ways to begin.

Cast the vision often and the importance of every role

A no small role mindset begins when everyone understands the significance of their role and why their contribution matters. When you make this a priority it builds a sense of pride that everyone is contributing to a cause and purpose that matters and without them, it wouldn’t happen. 

Cast the expectations

Just as Stanislavsk demanded the best of every actor, regardless of the role, so too must you make expectations clear within your organization. A clear vision followed by clear expectations puts everyone on the same page and the possibility of success more attainable. Click To TweetThis can only work when egos are set aside and only what’s best for the team is embraced.

Play your best role

Not everyone will have the lead role, but everyone has a role to play. Attitudes matter, communication matters, trust matters, and commitment matters. These are the roles that when played with conviction will set your team apart from the rest. 

Final Thoughts

Understanding that there are no small roles is essential in leadership. Every role is important and every role matters. As does every person. It’s when everyone knows it and gives it their all that teams can reach their full potential.

 

©2022 Doug Dickerson

Why People Fire Their Leaders – And How To Stop It

Credit: Google Images

People quit people, not companies – John Maxwell

I remember my first job out of college. I was excited and filled with great enthusiasm. But it played out like A Tale of Two Cities, “it was the best of times, it was the worst of times”. I was surrounded by people I genuinely liked with many friends. With a great team in place, we made great strides in the community we served. But I had “the boss from hell” who made life hell. So, I fired him. 

An article in Inc. magazine identified the top 5 characteristics that caused employees to leave their jobs. They are:

  • Management style — 37 percent
  • Condescending attitude — 30 percent
  • Mean or bad temper — 30 percent
  • Inappropriate behavior — 26 percent
  • Harassed employees — 24 percent

Speaking of bad boss behavior, here is a sampling of what respondents called unacceptable or deal-breaking behaviors: Your boss takes credit for your work 63%, your boss doesn’t trust or empower you 62%; your boss doesn’t care if you’re overworked 58%, your boss doesn’t advocate for you when it comes to compensation 57%, your boss hires and/or promotes the wrong people 56%, your boss doesn’t provide proper direction on assignments/roles 54%, your boss micromanages and doesn’t allow you “freedom to work” 53%, etc. 

When you look at the above examples of why people leave their work or the characteristics of bad bosses, one thing is certain – there is a leadership gap.  As it relates to employee engagement, bad bosses, company morale, and corporate culture, how the leadership gap is addressed going forward is critical. A boss without strong leadership skills will drive his or he people away.

I’ve said it in this space before: Building the type of organization that your people would never dream of leaving begins by being the type of leader everyone wants to follow. Let’s explore three basic ways in which you can build that type of culture.

Serve your people

The higher you ascend in your organization the more responsibilities you take on – not more rights. This is where many a boss drops the leadership ball. Think of a pyramid. The old way of thinking is that at the bottom you have many rights and at the top, few responsibilities. Now flip it- when you do, the opposite becomes true. You now have more responsibilities as the leader/boss and fewer rights. Now, start acting like it. 

You will build the type of organization people would never dream of leaving when you develop the mindset of servant leadership and by empowering your people at every opportunity. Click To Tweet

Empower your people

Employee engagement is directly tied to empowered employees. The cited survey, along with many others drive this point home. If your people are micromanaged, underappreciated, and not given credit for their ideas and work, is it any wonder they are firing their bosses? 

Billy Hornsby said, “ It’s okay to let those you lead outshine you, for if they shine brightly enough, they reflect positively on you”. The boss who makes for a good leader understands that when his or her people are empowered it makes them look good. You will build the type of organization they would never dream of leaving when you empower them to reach their full potential.

Engage your people

Employee engagement is only as meaningful and effective as the leader who engages on this level. The boss who only sees employee engagement as something “they do” may have the work of his employees’ hands, but will never have their hearts. If you want to stop your people from walking out the door, then you must open yours. You must be among your people, know your people, and serve them. Click To Tweet

Building the type of organization people would never dream of leaving begins when you understand that they are the most appreciable asset you have. Simply put, employee engagement begins at the top.

Final Thoughts

There’s no way in this space to take a deep dive into all of the issues that need to be addressed here. But engaged and invested people need to step up and help right the ship. What role will you play in closing the back door and helping build the type of culture no one would ever dream of leaving?

 

© 2022 Doug Dickerson