The Sweet Spot of Encouragement

Photo Credit: Google Images
Photo Credit: Google Images

If you are a leader, you should never forget that everyone needs encouragement. And everyone who receives it- young or old, successful or less-than-successful, unknown or famous- is changed by it. – John Maxwell

A story is told of American painter, John Sargent, who once painted a panel of roses that was highly praised by his critics. It was a small picture, but it approached perfection.

Although offered a high price for it on many occasions, Sargent refused to sell it. He considered it his best work and was very proud of it. Whenever he was deeply discouraged and doubtful of his abilities as an artist, he would look at it and remind himself, “I painted that.” Then his confidence and ability would come back to him.

In all of my years in leadership, I have yet to find a leader who didn’t want, need, or appreciate a little encouragement. I believe it’s a universal need and one not just exclusive to leaders. Regardless of your walk in life, who doesn’t appreciate some encouragement along the way?

The above story is a reminder to us of some simple truths about leadership. Let me share three with you.

Every leader has value

John Sargent is considered to be the leading portrait painter of his generation. His mark on the world was made through the arts.

Your gifts or talents may not revolve around being a distinguished artist, but your value exists in other areas. Perhaps you have organizational gifts that keep your business running smooth. You might be the visionary that causes people to see the big picture which creates the necessary momentum to plan for the future. You might be the change agent who speaks the truth about what needs to happen for the sake of your future. (I wrote about how you can add value to your respective organizations here.)

The point here is this: You are a person of value not because of what you do but because of who you are. Your value is more than what you contribute to the bottom line.

Every leader has doubts

Despite his acclaim as an artist, John Sargent still had seasons of discouragement and moments when he called his own abilities into question. Sound familiar?

At some point in time, I think every leader experiences the same struggle. I have. (I wrote about facing your doubts and fears here). We look at heroes in our respective fields of expertise and we say, “If I can only be successful like them, then I will have it made,” not realizing they most likely had the same struggle.

We unfairly compare ourselves to others and think that because we haven’t reached the same level of fame or success then we are a failure – not realizing it may have taken them decades to get there and we want to be there in a fraction of the time. It’s unrealistic and self-defeating. And in the end, discouragement sets in.

The point here is this: You are not the sum of your doubts and fears. And your growth and development as a leader is not a 50-yard dash, it’s a marathon.

Every leader has a sweet spot

John Sargent held on to the prized painting as a reminder of his talents. In moments of self-doubt and discouragement, it motivated him to keep going.

The sweet spot in your leadership comes when you realize that you are not as great as the headlines you write yourself. You are not as bad as the headlines your enemies or critics write. Joy in leadership comes when you discover your why, find fulfillment in the moment, and live for something greater than yourself. (I wrote about finding your purpose in leadership here).

For Sargent, his sweet spot moment came when his focus was on his best work, not his worse. Train yourself to look at the positive. Don’t allow the negative things to define you.

The point here is this: How you rise above self-doubt and discouragement begins with how you see yourself.

Have you found your sweet spot?

 

© 2017 Doug Dickerson

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The Measure of Your Worth

 

Credit: Google Images
Credit: Google Images

Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value. – Albert Einstein

Perhaps no composer has captured the musical heart and soul of America as did Irving Berlin. In addition to familiar favorites such as “God Bless America” and “Easter Parade,” he wrote, “I’m Dreaming of a White Christmas,” which still ranks as the all-time best-selling musical score. In an interview for the San Diego Union, Don Freemand asked Berlin, “Is there any question you’ve never been asked that you would like someone to ask you?” “Well, yes, there is one,” he replied. “‘What do you think of the many songs you’ve written that didn’t become hits?’ My reply would be that I still think they are wonderful.”

When it comes to the value that is placed upon you as a leader, regardless of the industry you are in, there is a formula for calculating your worth that is possibly being overlooked.

Certain things continually show up in the rubric of work that are measurements of success that people look to in order to prescribe your worth. Fair or not, that tends to be the norm. Performance reviews center around one’s ability to stay on task, how well he/she works with others, meeting specified goals, contributions to the bottom line etc. (all of which are important and are not meant to be diminished here).

Go back to the story for a moment. While Irving Berlin was famous for the songs we all know and love, he was equally as proud of the ones that did not become hits. It serves as a great reminder for us as leaders. Do you think anyone would think less of Berlin as a gifted singer for recording songs that did not make it to the top of the charts? No.

But herein lies the dilemma. There are countless leaders the world over who daily contribute in thousands of different ways to their respective organizations who do not get the recognition, notoriety, and fame like some do. Does that make them any less a leader in their own right? Certainly not!

Allow me to give you a word of encouragement and a few simple reminders of just how valuable you are as a leader and as a person even if you feel like no one sees, no one cares, or if no one is paying attention. I’d like to frame it from an excerpt from Mother Teresa’s “Do It Anyway” poem.

“If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.  Be kind anyway.”

Your worth as a leader is not based upon what other people think or say about you. Be kind and find your lane to operate in and don’t allow yourself to be defined by your critics.

“If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you.  Be honest and sincere anyway.”

Your worth as a leader may be underestimated by those who mistake your honesty and character for weakness. It’s not. And when others try to deceive you they will soon learn that lesson the hard way.

“What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight.  Create anyway.”

Your worth as a leader is found in the value that you add to others. It is also reflective in the value that you bring to your organization. Others may by their actions and attitudes tear down or destroy, but keep building anyway.

“If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous.  Be happy anyway.”

Your worth as a leader is found in your ability to lay your head down at night and be at peace with yourself, with others, and with your Creator. The serenity in your heart the happiness on your countenance may make others jealous, but your worth is not measured by their unhappiness. You have happiness in your heart for a reason. Don’t give it up.

“Give the best you have, and it will never be enough.  Give your best anyway.”

Your worth as a leader is not found it what you take but in what you give. Although in the grand scheme of things it may never be deemed enough, give your best anyway. The measure of your worth and your value as a leader is not defined by where others think you’ve come up short but by what’s in your heart. Keep giving your best!

“In the final analysis, it is between you and God.  It was never between you and them anyway.”

Take this one last piece of encouragement to heart. At the end of the day this what you hang your hat on. Be encouraged. Stay strong. Keep serving. You now know who’s keeping score.

 

© 2016 Doug Dickerson

 

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